My descent into trolldom is now complete

I don't spend much time on my city's community forum these days — there's only so much doom and gloom a girl can take — so I almost missed the newest squabble ... which really isn't all that new, to be honest.  It's yet another iteration of the Evil Townies® debate:

Succinctly put, it goes something like this:

[Townie]: I'm in ur countryside, drinkin' ur well water.
[Hick]: GTFO!!!
[Townie]: HAHA.  You can't make me.  QQ moar, scrub.

No, really.  The only thing missing is Chuck Norris.  >.>

So I was trolling perusing the forum this morning, and stumbled across a paragraphs-long rant that started like this:

For those of you whiners who continue to make false claims and complaints against my town, here is a little lip service for you— ...

I tried to read it.  I really, really did.

But I just couldn't get past the first line — or the OP's avatar.

So Maricopa isn't entirely for the Horde, after all.  Pity.

As ashamed as I am to admit it, my descent into trolldom is now complete: